I Don't Feel So Bad...

I was just at the store picking up some milk and while I was waiting in line I perused through the latest issue of the National Enquirer. In this issue they spotlighted pictoral documentation of the worst Hollywood body parts. I got grossed out on the likes of Halle Berry's boogars, Clint Eastwood's vericosey leg, Katie Holmes' cold-sore inflicted lip, and Ashlee Simpson's forked tongue. My face looks immaculate compared to all those barf-outs! Thanks go out to the Corporate Hollywood Celebrity Machine for raising my self-esteem. Yay!

PS: There's a great photo of Lindsay Lohan later on in that issue. She's posing with some druggie and behind them on some table there sits, quite noticably, a wad of coke. Haha!