My Mom's NeverEnding Garage Sale
Throughout the year, my mom holds an on-going ritual of preparing for and holding garage sales. Anytime there isn't snow on the ground my mom opens up her garage in hopes of selling some old out-of-fashion shirts, taped together bunches of used ice-cream buckets, or Harlequin romance novels from 1979 - all in hopes of making an extra dime. I've asked her why she goes through all the hassle. And let me tell you, it is a hassle! I get to hear about every little detail in the horrible process of setting up and holding this sale of hers. Nobody helps her out. The price of newspaper ads. The fat, ugly people who show up and have the nerve to try to "chew" her prices down. The packing-up of all the crap that didn't sell. The time she takes off from work to sit in her garage. The slut that lives next door. The brats in the other house. The jerks who show up before the sale is supposed to start. Oh boy, the list goes on!!! Anyways, I asked her why she just doesn't pack it all up and send it off to Goodwill or St. Vincents and just be done with it. Instead of doing all this work for a few extra quarters and dimes, she could write it off on her taxes. "Psht! I'm not giving it all away!" Alright, then, jeeze, I see how it is! It's just another element to mom's life that will give her something to bitch about!
Watch out, Pam! Tasha's off her leash!!!
posted by J.P. @ 6:32 PM
3 Comments:
A neat garage sale!
I wonder if i could "chew" her prices down.
Ohmygosh! "chew" ---yikes!!!!! For some reason I never knew (until well after I escaped Beaver Dam), and I'm not sure if my parents knew either, that the word was really "jew" and is a horrilbe ethnic slander! All these years my parents would go to flea markets or garage sales and "chew" down the price. When I heard it as a kid I always pictured them biting into prices...so I was hit hard with the truth when I mentioned "chewing someone down" in front of my friends (Hi Carol-Z!) and they were open-mouthed in shock! I had no clue!!!
Man--
You are quite the prolific blogger lately!
It's funny because on our recent trip to Hawaii our friends' parents and grandparents (and siblings?) were reported as saying the same "jewing down" with regard to shopping at the "swap meet" (flea market)...
more commentary at some future point... I've got too much schoolwork.
Oh yeah, about "Tasha..." Your mom is really... uh... kind of uh... "intense" about her animals, eh? I remember about 10 years ago or so she brought a dog when she visited you in Madison and I was there. She refused to let me look at the dog or pet it or anything. I ain't scared a no dogs!
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